Top Ten Awkward Trump Debate Excuses (September 10, 2024)

I can't be expected to debate seriously against someone so stupid
Hey moderator—where's the question about whether she's black?
That was possibly my best debate ever
She was using her earrings to communicate with Nancy Pelosi, Attila the Hun, and other horrible women
How can Komrade Kamala be so upbeat when we are a country in decline?
The audience at the debate venue went crazy for me
They must have given her the questions beforehand. How else could a DEI hire beat someone with my incredible genes?
That "let's shake hands" maneuver she pulled was very unexpected and very unfair. Waagh!
Dad would roll over in his grave if he ever found out I lost to a mixed-breed black woman from India
She'd make a terrible president, but she is very good looking

Posted October 7, 2024

Commentary

This funny top ten list makes light of Donald Trump's failure to take ownership of his poor performance in the U.S. presidential debate against Kamala Harris on Tuesday, September 10, 2024. The debate was moderated by ABC's David Muir and Linsey Davis.

Item 10 is an insult disguised as an excuse that is reminiscent of an old Fred Flintstone insult that was disguised as an apology. (In an episode of The Flintstones, Barney Rubble asks Fred to apologize for calling him stupid, so Fred replies, "I'm sorry you're stupid." Hmm, could The Flintstones be where Trump gets his schtick?)

Items 8 and 5 give life to the Trump fantasy that he actually performed well during the debate. Items 7 and 4 are references to right-wing conspiracy theories about the debate. For reasons we don't understand, we injected some truth into items 1 and 2.