| Num | Boarding Zone | Rationale |
|---|---|---|
| 10.) | Zone 5 | Toenail fungus AND skid marks |
| 9.) | Zone 4 | Skid marks |
| 8.) | Zone 3 | Often can't solve Wordle in six tries AND middle name is not "Delta" |
| 7.) | Zone 2 | Circles the block cautiously before turning into driveway AND has memorized the lyrics of "Don't Worry, Be Happy" |
| 6.) | Zone 1 | Unflinchingly loyal AND prefers Post raisin bran cereal over Kellogg's |
| 5.) | Comfort | Willing to pay extra for more legroom OR a lapdance |
| 4.) | Premium Select | Upper middle class AND has seen neither the Barbie nor Oppenheimer movies |
| 3.) | First Class | Wealthy AND holds pinky out when sipping tea |
| 2.) | Bruce Wayne | I'm Batman |
| 1.) | Crazy Rich Asians | Highly price insensitive |
Posted April 2, 2024
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