Top Ten Things We're Thankful For

Top Ten Things We're Thankful For—Part 2

We're not being followed around by Gollum
We live in a house with indoor plumbing and heat
We didn't accidentally leave Kevin home alone
We've never struck out in any of our major league at bats
Our friend Lucy only charges 5 cents for advice
We're not a crooked dirty jockey, and we don't drive a crooked hoss
Ye didn't ask us to be his presidential running mate
When we push a boulder up a hill, it doesn't keep coming loose and rolling back down the hill
Our boss at the factory never belittled us for wanting to become a dentist
An eagle doesn't swoop down and eat our liver every day

Posted December 2, 2022

Commentary

It's now time for our second whimsical top ten list of things we're thankful for. And, based on current visibility, we're happy to report that we expect to be able to extend this series to three lists. Notify the authorities!

Only one of these items is genuine (item 9). As was the case with our first installment, several of the items are references to plot elements from Christmas shows (items 8, 6, 5, and 2). We like this formula so much that we may very well use it again. It also brightens our day to know that some readers are scratching their heads as to why they chuckled at one or two of those jokes, given that the jokes so obviously could have been thought up by a third grader. Ha!

We also threw in a couple of references to Greek mythology (items 3 and 1) because Greek mythology is cool. Item 7 is some sort of math nerd joke. Bye now!

This image of "man pushing a boulder up a hill" was created by Klugmeister using artificial intelligence software. The image was reviewed by Klugmeister before posting on this web page.